Peripheral (nineveh_rains) wrote,
Peripheral
nineveh_rains

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I am getting help

I went to the doctor, even though it wasn't the appointment I was supposed to go to. The nurse (Monique) was really nice, giving me some juice and a tissue and patting my leg. They set me up with a crisis centre and some counselling and are adjusting my medication.

In the process of losing a close friend, I have also gained one. Although your tidbits of wisdom provided floatsam for me to cling to in my storm, I believe that it is genuine care that will pull me through this. None of this, "I'll only be there when it's convenient for me" stuff. And I never even asked...
Whoever's prayer you are an answer to, I am forever grateful. Memories of you are so surreal, like a dream. I feel okay when you're around. I think because of your no strings attached, no judgement passed care.

Those of you reading this... you may think that I am seeing something I want to see; something that isn't there... but he told me, without even knowing the half of what he was getting into, to use him as a crutch to help myself. *bliss* He promised to help me in every way possible so long as I promised to help him do so.

I still can hardly believe this. Perhaps he is an angel (they are male after all). This whole thing is reminding me WAY too much of City Of Angels.

Well, the good news is I have fond things to think of instead of the betrayal I have been dragged through. I hope it helps. I hope getting back on the meds regularily helps with my sleeping and eating and thoughts.
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