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x-posted [Jun. 11th, 2010|08:08 pm]
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[Current Mood |frustratedfrustrated]

I'm not sure if this is more of a social anxiety thing or a borderline thing...

Does anyone else fear that their actions/words/etc. will be mis-interpreted by others? Or that people will make false assumptions and then label you accordingly? I am alway worried that people will perceive me as something other than intended. An example would be, I often ask questions, either out of curiousity or naiveté, which are often perceived as flippant or sarchastic. I guess I am just worried about what other people think of me, but mostly it really bothers me when they make assumptions and hold me to them as if it were something I had personally defined.

I'll try to explain more if anyone is interested.
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: trixieross
2010-06-12 02:54 am (UTC)
I constantly am worried that I am being misinterpreted. I actually think it happens alot though with me. I think my fears are with good reason. I just don't come across all that clearly.
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[User Picture]From: nineveh_rains
2010-06-12 05:05 am (UTC)
It has happened to me severely in several instances (being misinterpreted - or more accurately, interpreted when there was nothing to interpret to begin with!) Lost my girlfriend because of it...

I like you just fine! :) *hugs*
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[User Picture]From: trixieross
2010-06-12 05:15 am (UTC)
I'm sorry you lost your girlfriend honey :(
I have lost several friends because they interpretted me as being too shy in person. Who actually dumps someone for that?!! jeeze

I like you too! <3 <3 <3
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[User Picture]From: nineveh_rains
2010-06-13 07:59 pm (UTC)
Well, it wasn't about being shy. She broke up with me (as far as I know) due to assumptions on her part and mis-interpreting my motives and intentions; reasons why behind the things I do. (Hope that's not too confusing!)
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[User Picture]From: trixieross
2010-06-13 08:20 pm (UTC)
yeah it is hard to interpret people's motives. Mine are often misunderstood. When really, my motives are usually quite simple. lol
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[User Picture]From: nineveh_rains
2010-06-13 08:24 pm (UTC)
Yeah! I know what you mean.
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[User Picture]From: _radioactivity
2010-06-12 12:05 pm (UTC)
Well, I have a twin sister so people automatically assume that I have the same personality as her. I'm an outrageous loud maniac, and she's very calm and quiet.

I constantly worry that people are judging me off of her. But, I don't only worry about just her... it's myself in general. I understand how you feel.

*hugs*
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[User Picture]From: dreamingbear
2010-06-12 05:35 pm (UTC)
Huh... apparently those people don't really know much about twins... cuz twins are often polar opposite personalities...
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[User Picture]From: _radioactivity
2010-06-12 06:55 pm (UTC)
Yep, that is the complete truth. For me anyway.
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[User Picture]From: nineveh_rains
2010-06-13 08:15 pm (UTC)
She may feel the same way (ie. that people judge her based on what you're like). You never know!

*hugs back* Thanks.
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[User Picture]From: nineveh_rains
2010-06-13 08:22 pm (UTC)
I guess I get frustrated because I feel that if someone loves me (or cares about me), they ought to understand me and know me.

I do my best not to let mind-reading get in the way of my feelings regarding anyone. And if I suspect that it might be occuring, I voice it so that the belief can either be confirmed or corrected. It frustrates me when I try to be honest with someone and they are just too huffy about what I thought to help explain to me why I was wrong.

Human interaction is freakin' impossible!
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[User Picture]From: dreamingbear
2010-06-12 05:38 pm (UTC)
I don't know if it's a borderline or social anxiety thing... Social anxiety doesn't hit me often...

However, I've gotten to a point where I just assume people are going to not understand what I just said (because I can have an odd way of phrasing things) or overinterpret what I am saying (especially online). Then I'm vaguely amused when I don't have to interpret what I just said to the person. :-D
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[User Picture]From: nineveh_rains
2010-06-13 08:18 pm (UTC)
I guess it's not so bad if you don't have the anxiety that goes along with it. It's not just words that I am talking about though. It is mostly intent or motives that people like to assume and I have no idea where they get that from.
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[User Picture]From: dreamingbear
2010-06-13 11:07 pm (UTC)
I'm not sure I follow - but then again I am hopped up on cold meds at the moment.
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[User Picture]From: ysabetwordsmith
2010-06-16 08:33 pm (UTC)

Well...

People frequently do misinterpret me or fail to understand me. This is because I am simply outside their scope, and always have been. On rare occasions -- say, at a celebration for someone I really care about -- I can scrunch myself down and pass for ordinary, for a maximum of about three hours. But it's like holding my breath; it's hard to do and it's miserable. So most of the time I just be myself and let other people wonder what to go do about it. This works for me, but is unlikely to work for someone who is not social teflon like I am.
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[User Picture]From: xlife_n_deathx
2010-06-28 04:23 pm (UTC)
Yes, but that's because it always happens to me. People completely misinterpret what I'm saying, especially when I say it with a neutral tone. They don't seem to understand what I'm saying when I say it neutrally. It confuses people.
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[User Picture]From: nineveh_rains
2010-06-28 07:02 pm (UTC)
You also have family with selective memories...
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